The Party Unfolded
On Saturday we hosted the Memorial for my sister. I have to say, it was a lovely tribute for her - she would have been so happy - she would have had a blast.
Nieces and Nephews, sisters, great nieces and nephews - came from far and wide - through terrible weekend traffic - to honour her.
I put together a small photo album, with photos from when she was a child, a teenager - a working career woman at the University. I wanted to create a picture of a woman who was more than her addictions - more than a fuck up.
I wanted us all to see her at five years old - her life ahead of her - spinning in the sunshine. That photo ended up representing everything about her to me - her free spirit. I wanted them to see her sitting at her desk, smiling - organized and fully functioning.
I think I succeeded. I am exactly 10 years younger than Marilyn, we were a family of 5 sisters but she was my only sibling at home, our older sisters married and out the door by 1970. She was the one I would ask for help when the television went wonky. She was the one who took me downtown to shop for my first pair of straight-legged jeans when I was in grade 9. She was the one I went drinking with at age 15 - and I would bum cigarettes from when I was 16. Not all the lessons were good ones, but I also learnt from her mistakes.
And she was wickedly funny until the wine pushed her into that maudlin place.
On Saturday night long after the house was empty, husband and I were dancing in front of the fireplace to the 1970s playlist on spotify I created for her - and I admit to drinking an entire bottle of white wine, and I hate white wine, and having a brutal headache on Sunday.
Now - the event is behind me and I am left with this chasm of time for August that does not include lists and tasks. My house is clean and freshly painted and I see some serious time ahead at the beach.
I think I am exhausted.
Nieces and Nephews, sisters, great nieces and nephews - came from far and wide - through terrible weekend traffic - to honour her.
I put together a small photo album, with photos from when she was a child, a teenager - a working career woman at the University. I wanted to create a picture of a woman who was more than her addictions - more than a fuck up.
I wanted us all to see her at five years old - her life ahead of her - spinning in the sunshine. That photo ended up representing everything about her to me - her free spirit. I wanted them to see her sitting at her desk, smiling - organized and fully functioning.
I think I succeeded. I am exactly 10 years younger than Marilyn, we were a family of 5 sisters but she was my only sibling at home, our older sisters married and out the door by 1970. She was the one I would ask for help when the television went wonky. She was the one who took me downtown to shop for my first pair of straight-legged jeans when I was in grade 9. She was the one I went drinking with at age 15 - and I would bum cigarettes from when I was 16. Not all the lessons were good ones, but I also learnt from her mistakes.
And she was wickedly funny until the wine pushed her into that maudlin place.
On Saturday night long after the house was empty, husband and I were dancing in front of the fireplace to the 1970s playlist on spotify I created for her - and I admit to drinking an entire bottle of white wine, and I hate white wine, and having a brutal headache on Sunday.
Now - the event is behind me and I am left with this chasm of time for August that does not include lists and tasks. My house is clean and freshly painted and I see some serious time ahead at the beach.
I think I am exhausted.
Sounds like it was a wonderful memorial service. I can well imagine that you are exhausted on every level. You deserve some serious "me time" to rest and rejuvenate now.
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